We’ve all been taught that it’s not appropriate — or nice — to be spiteful or vindictive, especially in matters of the heart. The thing is, there’s a certain guilty satisfaction some of us feel from time to time when we indulge in thinking about getting even with people who have done us wrong.
Now, I’m not a great believer in revenge. It eats up a lot of good time that could otherwise be spent in positive efforts that won’t benefit the person who has wronged you. That being said, psychologists will tell you that a little bit of fanciful daydreaming of the nasty sort can prove to be a freeing experience as long as it’s a quick visit.
Studies over the last few years have proven that while there are definitely hidden pleasure in daydreams filled with retaliatory themes, the fact of the matter is that most people don’t act out on those daydreams because they are completely aware that making those daydreams a reality will only make them miserable. Why? Because at the heart of the matter, most people don’t like hurting others no matter what the reason.
What’s more, most people realize that they can’t restore justice by inflicting punishment on someone who doesn’t know — or who doesn’t care to know — how much damage he or she has inflicted on others.
It’s not that most people are better than those who have hurt others and it’s not that most people don’t fantasize of indulging in petty, vindictive behaviors in order to extract their pound of flesh. It’s that most people realize that actually getting even won’t restore the balance that existed prior to the other person’s hurtful behaviour.
However, I’ve always found that the best revenge you can actually bring to a bad situation is to get over the situation and move forward in a positive way. Don’t look back. Don’t have regrets. Don’t hold on to nastiness. Let go with love.
But sometimes — maybe once in a blue moon or so — it’s not such a bad idea to actually spend 3 or 4 minutes indulging in fanciful daydreams that settle the score before returning to reality. And sometimes, if you’re really lucky, you’ll find someone who has written a song that expresses a few of the feelings you’ve had over the years when it comes to those sorts of daydreams, and you’ll be thankful that someone else has put into words the thoughts you’ve hidden away from time to time.
If you need a guilty pleasure treat, click HERE and listen to this song by Jaron Wood.